I have this pet peeve about my mother that before she responds to a question or argument she takes this really long accentuated pause. She blinks once, then enunciates a slow “oh – kay” and breathes in deeply as if gathering the energy to persuade you. Unfortunately, this pause is the moment she loses the audience because the audience – ever perceptive – knows that it’s about to be dragged like cattle through a never-ending desert.
That was a little anecdote (my pause) before I proceed to slide down the rabbit hole of a mega argument.
You know what?
It’d take a big chunk of my day to scribble away my thoughts in this dark room, and the pool is all alone out there. I wanted to discredit Kant, compare socialism and freedom, the aggravating condescendance (I prefer the noun in French) of boomers, but it’s so giant a topic, the weight just flattened me. I give up. I won’t change anybody’s mind. I’m moving when this is over. (That’s what I say when I give up. I’m moving to Europe! To liberal-haven New York!)
Or maybe I’ll write tomorrow, you caught me on a bad day.
Maybe this is why we lose elections — millennials get easily distracted with wanting to live in the moment. But it’s too beautiful a day to ruin it with politics. Although not writing it will torture me with ceaseless anxiety. No, I’ve already had enough fighting for one morning. Hey, being a septuagenarian does not mean you have a monopoly on truth because of your life experience, just FYI. The gall of that man!
According to my therapist arguing about ideals makes my temper skyrocket because of my potential anxiety disorder. According to The NewYorker though, if I would have lived during Kierkegaard’s time I would have just had the simple diagnosis of being an intellectual. Just kidding, I’m only slightly a neurotic and this was a very uncomfortable back-and-forth. Would it help if I said this was just a Woody-Allen-type spiel meant to entertain and not actually a varied dialogue in my head? Because I swear that was the point.
Forgive me, I’m usually thorough in my work. I neither entertained you nor reasoned with you on the topic intended. You will see a blog post up on freedom and balance next week right after my post about psychological colonization.
Enjoy the weekend!